• theangryseal@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    You wouldn’t want to see an angry seal penis anyway. Or maybe you would? You dodged a bullet. Or maybe you didn’t?

    I have the most typical penis. Nothing special. I’ll describe it if you want. Just your average everyday penis. Now you’re curious. I’m sorry.

    I’ll describe it.

    Tip like a mushroom, shaft like a stem. Balls where the mycelium would normally be, but not buried. Just hanging out above ground. Mostly black hair, a few grays scattered in. A few inches from an asshole with a prominent hemorrhoid scar. Mostly soft, but occasionally not so soft. Has produced more offspring than is typical. Vasectomy incoming.

    Hope that helps.