I’ve used this term before in a different context: It’s what happens when someone is about to do something that both scares and excites them at the same time. Like when a person suddenly finds themselves extremely attracted to someone and they want to make a good impression. That’s when their brain seems to be both there and not there at the same time.

When observing someone in this sort of situation you quickly come to the conclusion that the brain has gone but then later–upon reflection–it may seem like it may have actually been present. The only way to know for sure is to find out how the events eventually concluded; opening the box as it were.

That’s when you find out whether or not the person was a pussy.

Use a robot to secretly paint “Kamala” on his lawn. For bonus points use AI to generate an image of him kissing Kamala and use that as the image (wonder what kind of resolution one can get on a lawn? 🤔)

Two of our (gay couple) neighbors said something similar to me a while back: They’re too afraid to put up a sign or flag.

My house doesn’t have any LGBTQ people living in it but we have a HUGE fucking LGBTQ flag right across from the American flag. It’s been such a blessing too! Now the most annoying of my neighbors don’t try to smalltalk with me anymore about their absolutely batshit insane conspiracy theories 👍

Just your average dead whale beheading to bring home the trophy. Nothing special!

Conservatives: This is how the zombie apocalypse starts… With one person refusing to let medical professionals know about their problem.

I’d use a very real scenario of immigrants and “merely visiting” foreigners who get sick spreading any given disease (e.g. How do you think we ended up with Zika in Florida?) but I know conservatives aren’t interested in reality. Even JD Vance knows that in order to get conservatives attention you need to promote fiction.

The correct response is for thousands of people to respond on Xitter with, “And no one is even trying to assassinate Musk 🤔”

As expected, nobody cares about “reader mode”. Only once in my life has it ever come in handy… It was a website that was so badly designed I swore never to go back to it ever again.

I forget what it was but apparently I wasn’t the only one and thus, it must’ve died a fast death as I haven’t seen it ever again (otherwise I’d remember).

Basically, any website that gets users so frustrated that they resort to reader/simplified mode isn’t going to last very long. If I had my way I would change the messages:

“This website appears to be total shit. Do you want Firefox to try to fix it so your eyes don’t bleed trying to get through it?”

I want an extension that does this, actually! It doesn’t need to actually modify the page. Just give me a virtual assistant to comiserate with…

“The people who made this website should have their browser’s back button removed entirely as punishment for erecting this horror!”

Don’t ever change, Catholic Church. More and more people are starting to catch on. In 100 years there might not be a Catholic Church anymore and the world will be better for it.

This headline could’ve appeared every month for the past 2000 years. It’s just that only in modern times are priests and pastors facing actual consequences.

Nonsense! Calum is doing what Calum does at home. If the company doesn’t want to see it they shouldn’t be watching him like that when he’s at home.

Remember: Calum isn’t feeling well. Any doctor would say Calum is doing his part to get better and stay healthy!

Clearly the company wants the employees to bring their sick children into the office. Bring the sniffling, sneezing, coughing, wipe-their-snot-on-everything child right into the boss’s office and proudly proclaim your support of the sick leave policy!

“Give my boss a hug, sweetheart!”

I’m glad you left out, “thoughts” because we all know that was never a factor in this.

He’s trying to counter witchcraft with whiney bitchcraft.

Lying liar lies about his stock liquidation plans.

Everyone that still holds stock after Trump is allowed to sell is a sucker. A sucker that absolutely will deserve those losses. It’d be like investing in Bernie Madoff at this point… After he’s proven to the world that he’s a fraud a thousand times over, people are still throwing money at Trump’s bullshit.

Future news: “I invested almost all my savings into this!”

Who could’ve known he was lying about selling it all as fast as he could‽

Everyone with half a brain, that’s who.

Now maybe Republicans can understand how it feels to be misgendered? Nah, that would require empathy!

You’d think everyone would’ve caught on by now with so many of them being misidentified as real men.

The writers of Happy Birthday are still cracking their whips from the grave!

declared that the White House would “smell like curry” if Vice President Kamala Harris were to win in November,

I can’t be the only one who thinks that would be a welcome development. More Asian dishes in the White House would be fantastic. Why does the right hate Asian food? 🤔

I say this a white American, “What’s wrong with curry‽”

I’ll come out and say it: If you elect this white guy (me) as president I would make the White House smell like curry from time to time 🍛

Wait: Do they expect me to eat like some British dude during WW2‽ I mean, that’s how the British are still eating (rose water? No thank you!) but still…

Maybe those on the right need a DEI food program.

Is there a “consequence news” Lemmy community? Seems like this would fall under that category.

Never trust any organization with “heritage” in its name.

Nothing says, “normal” and, “sane” like typing up a long rant in ALL CAPS declaring, “I WON!” while your opponent holds the gold.

Kissing? Try watching True Blood with the fam 👍

“It’s a horror show”