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Joined 7 months ago
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Cake day: February 22nd, 2026

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  • One time a former partner and I were doing it in the morning. Sunlight streaming through the window. They’re on top. Everything’s great.

    They’re on their period. They dismount. Some combination of biology and physics made my dick like slap back toward my stomach, and flick a huge splatter of blood into the air. In my mind it went in slow motion, shimmering and roiling through the sunlight until it hit the wall. I was like “holy shit that was amazing!!”

    They were really embarrassed and ran off to the bathroom.







  • I don’t think “friends” works well as a binary yes/no. There are many different kinds of friends, Some people are like cacti and only need to be watered once a year. Other people are like… I’m not a gardener, but some other kind of plant that needs frequent watering. Some are weeds that will take over your entire home. This metaphor got away from me a little.

    Personally, I follow a strategy of “when you have the energy, demonstrate the behavior you want to see.” So if you have the juice to handle an unsatisfying outcome, reach out to them like you’d want to be reached out to. Invite them to a party. Send them a funny meme. Whatever. They might flake. They might not respond. But you only do this when you can handle that disappointment. If someone’s been real flakey and you just can’t deal with it, you don’t have to go the extra mile for them.