• MonkRome@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    Tbf in some cultures its rude not to initially decline and say, “no its too much”, or imply your not worthy of that much.

    • Neverclear@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      5 days ago

      That is vanity disguised as manners. It is one thing to show respect to present company. But to teach people that “no” means “make me take it”… that is a dangerous game.

      • KubeRoot@discuss.tchncs.de
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        5 days ago

        Yes, but the problem is that it’s ingrained in culture, and most people are raised with that attitude, so if you raise your kid to act differently, you’re setting them up to be rude in the perception of others.

        • Neverclear@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          4 days ago

          True, just be aware that teaching the “polite refusal” custom may bring the “what is consent” discussion closer to necessity.

          • KubeRoot@discuss.tchncs.de
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            4 days ago

            I feel like discussing what consent is with your children is probably a must do, at some point, no matter what.

            I don’t like the polite refusal custom, and call it out in good company, but it’s similar to tipping - it’s so ingrained in cultures that it’s hard to root out, and any attempts to do so can hurt good people.

            • Neverclear@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              4 days ago

              If we set the example in daily life, that conversation can be a short one. For example, if you ask your partner to take out the trash instead of telling them to do it, that is one less source of cognitive dissonance, one less scenario that causes the child to say, “Why does consent matter here, but not there.”

  • Pat_Riot@lemmy.today
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    6 days ago

    Grandma respects your wishes. Maybe try not being a disingenuous prick and accept kindness and gifts when offered.

    • leg@leminal.space
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      4 days ago

      Like it or not, Harry Potter was massive. Popular things get memed. Popular people (actually, people in general) all suck in some way. Your favorite movie? Directed by a pedophile. Favorite show? Several racist cast members. Favorite book? Transphobe. This is just what humanity is. Enjoy the memes, ignore them, or continue shouting into the void. This will never stop happening though.

    • CheesyFingers@piefed.social
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      5 days ago

      So, you just expect everyone to know what you do.
      You don’t provide context or share information.
      Then you instead blame others.

      Great comment. 10/10 👏👏👏